Episode 20: Struggle Bus

 Just Two Cousins Chattering!! 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Just Cuz Podcast. I'm Jay. And this is Katina. Hey people. Hello. How that great stuff. We did it, we did it. It's good, Nate. Look, it's good to we don't see you, but we know that you're there. We know that you're here in your present. And we thank you. No, thank you guys so much for taking your time out to listen to us. We've given so much amazing feedback, guys. Thank you. And we just really love and appreciate all of you. So love you. Love you. Love you, love you, love you. Okay. All right, y'all. Here we come. You already know what it is. If you had a birthday, this is your special, special day. Because boom, boom, boom, boom. If you had a birthday, if you had a birthday, if you had a birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday, happy birthday, happy, happy, happy birthday. Guys, I never have it prepared. It's just for look, it came out the way it comes out, okay? Today was a remix. It was a remix. And so whoever's birthday just passed from um last week to this week, that was really special for you. Because you the turn up, okay? Because that was the remix. Right, right. So happy birthday to you. We are so happy that you saw another year, that you are in good health, that you look, that you are among the living. Right. Hallelujah. Okay. Right. And that God has so much in store for you guys. God bless. Period. So what's your mood, Tina? You want me to go first? Because you know I you always say that I make you go first. Okay. So, guys, look, this is when we do this temperature check. You got to check in with your people. Right. You got to check in with the people that you see every day, the people that you say you love so much. You have to check in with them. It's a lot going on in this world today. Tell them, Jay. So we got to check in. We got to make sure that we're good. We got to make sure that everybody is, is, even if you're not 100%, that you at least 75, 80. Like we maybe we can help you get to 100. Like, I mean, I don't know. Right. But check in with your people, check in with your children. Kids don't tell you stuff. No, they don't. Don't take it for granted. Yeah. Don't take it for granted that everybody is good. You don't know what's going on in their life. Just like you got stuff going on in yours, so do they. Yes. And we all handle stress and things, situations differently. So check in with your people. Yeah, and we don't even know how things are gonna affect them or how things are affecting them. Because you know, if it's affecting us, it's definitely affecting them. Right. So check in, check in. So my mood today, um, it's kind of rainy outside. Um, you know, we in the midst. Yeah, like, you know, we we in the midst of a of a um a storm or um little turbulence, a little something. But I'm calm. I'm sitting right here with Jesus in the eye of the storm, okay? I feel good. I feel good, I feel protected, I feel amazing. I am excited. There is so much that God is doing and look in front of us, out loud, and behind the scenes. And so we just give God the glory. Let me tell y'all something. My brother cousin, he put, I told y'all y'all gonna be in these socials. My brother cousin always hype us up. Tina's husband always hype us up. And he basically put out that they look, um, they on the roll, okay? They're gonna be on TV next week, okay? Which will be this week when this drops. And he was just like, get into it. Like, if you ain't into it, get into it. Because you don't want this train to get the mosey on, right? Right, right. So we're so excited for everything that God is doing. We thank God for the support. Because we look, the supporters, God raised y'all up for us. That's right. And we thank we thank him for that. So my mood is just very grateful, very excited, and in its um expectation for great things. That is so amazing. Oh my gosh, like the way that you describe that, you make me feel that way if I weren't feeling that way. So, for those of you that are going through or whatever your mood is for today, and it wasn't that, the way that she just described that, just take a little pinch of it. Take a little pinch of it because you're yeah, I know that's right. I'm sure. I know that's right. She said she got plenty for the service. Come on. But yeah, that's so amazing. That's so amazing, Jay. Um, so my mood, I woke up this morning. Well, from last night, you know, I I listened for the father to speak. And he told me he was like, I need you in a place of consecration. You have many things that are coming that are ahead of you, and I need you to be prepared. But the only way to be prepared is that you be in the right place in the right space, and that you have the instruction. So I woke up with that in mind because he prepared me on yesterday that today I needed to make sure that I was putting myself in that position. So I'm focused on, I'm focused on the Lord and hearing from hearing from him to receive his instruction and to also settle myself and settle my spirit. With all the things that are going on, it's easy to get caught up, just like what Jay was talking about a few minutes ago. You know, people are going through so many things, so it's easy to get caught up. So what God is telling me, or what he is doing with me right now, is he saying, in spite of all, I'm going to make sure that your spirit is settled and that peace is absolute. Just like what Jay said. That's why I said I can concur with you know what she's talking about, just like what she said. She said she feels like she's the peace in the middle of the storm. And this is the exact place in which God wants us to be. And this is the exact place of preparation. So this is where I am today. Tina, I think that is beautiful. I think that is amazing. Again, check in with y'all people and just just say, I want to check on you. Like, I just want to check check. Pray for your people too. You know, you know something, Jay. That's that's something that we miss. That's something that we miss. Like, we'll go into our prayer time, our prayer closet, and all this stuff, and we'll be so bound, and we're so bound by the things that we go through, and and may even forget to pray for other people, other people are going through. But let me tell you something. One thing that I know for sure is that if you focus your time on praying for other people, because that's what God calls us to do. If you focus your time on praying for other people, you don't have to worry about your request. God is going to make honor that he comes through. Yes, it's okay for you to um, you know, to talk to the Lord. It's good for you to talk to the Lord. Tell him what you want, tell him what you need. He tells us to, he, you know, he tells us you have not because you asked not. But um, but with all that being said, while you're doing what you're doing and you're talking to the Lord, talk to the Lord about your people. Yeah, yeah, definitely. I'd rather be blessed from God than, you know, I I'd rather pray and they be blessed because I prayed, and they be blessed the way that they need to be blessed, than for me to just call and check in, and it's you know, and all I am is an ear for them to vent in, and I I can't do anything for them, but I can do something for them through prayer. Yeah, that's true. Well, y'all, y'all heard it, and it must be very important because we keep saying it. Check with your people, guys. Right, right. Check with your people, make sure that they are good. We are losing young people. Like, I know of someone that put something out on Facebook about needing help and that they was tired and everything, and they were gone the next day. Oh my gosh. So check on your people, please, y'all. Just check on them. All right, y'all. We're moving on down the road, driving on down the street. Here we go. Cruising on down the street. Here we go. W D. This one for you, this one for me. W. Give it to them, girl. Look, I done started bopping over here. What would y'all do? Look, guys, this is the opportunity where you get to write in. You can send us an email. Maybe a little old school. Just cuz 80s at gmail.com, or you can DM us, okay? It is old school, but you can DM us on all of our social medias, baby. Facebook, TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat, okay. We everywhere. Everywhere. We're everywhere. We're everywhere. YouTube. Because you can even message us on YouTube, honey. Sure can. So look, this is where you get the opportunity to say, you know what? I got the situation. I'm trying to figure it out. I got some decisions to make. I don't want to make the wrong one. I just need a little bit of advice. Like, we are gonna give you what we think. Right. You can take it or you can leave it. Right. But we're gonna give you what we think, and hopefully you take it, and hopefully it's edifying. Right. Hopefully, it's gonna be something to help you along your way and to help your situation be better. Absolutely. Absolutely. What you got? What you got?

SPEAKER_02 10:17

What you got?

SPEAKER_00 10:19

What's going on today, Jay? Oh, excuse me. This one, my nephew pup's favorite. Oh because they be listening. Yeah, they listen. All right, guys. This person is anonymous, but I yeah, this is a woman. But it's it's anonymous. So anyway, this is so personal. I found out that I am pregnant. Oh, and I have been cheating on my husband. Oh. Okay, I might take my all back, y'all. Let me start off again. That's not an eye. Oh, that's a that's a oh. Okay, so this is so personal. I found out that I am pregnant and I have been cheating on my husband. So, yes, I don't know who the father is. I cannot tell my husband or my side if I tell the guy that I've been cheating with, he will expect me to leave my husband, and I am not ready to leave my husband. I was I was just having fun. My husband will literally kill the both of us. What do I do? She meant that. She meant that. Do you want to go first? Sure, I'll go first. Okay, girl. I'll go first on today. Um, oh Jesus. First off, um, she said, and I cannot tell, and I cannot tell either. Girl, how you gonna huh? What? What do you mean you cannot tell? At this point, you have no choice but to tell. How do you feel like that you're going to hide that number one from the man that you live in the household with and see every day and sleep with every night? Obviously, you sleep with other people at night too. Maybe not in the night, maybe in the daytime. I don't know. But my whole point is how do you Shady Boots? Woo! Tina was shady boots. I'm just saying, y'all. Go ahead. I'm just saying, I'm gonna put it out there because you just crept up on this thing like, oh no, I've made a mistake and I don't want to tell. You don't have a choice, you don't have a choice. And you owe that, you owe that to both sides. Not only just to your husband, but to the other side, as um Jay said, the side. You owe that to both. Reason being is because you open up that can of worms, you open up something else too. But you open up that can of worms. Tina is shitty! No, I'm really shady. I'm just giving it to you real. I'm giving it to you right. You open up that can of worms, and it's like how the old folks used to say, you make your bed and you gotta lie in it. Why would you wait until for what? I don't even know how long you even plan on waiting or why you would even wait. Because, okay, during this time you're gonna have to have prenatal care. How you gonna cover that? During this time, you're gonna start um having all these different um, all these different cravings, how you gonna cover that? You like your body's gonna change, how you gonna cover that? And when you start getting emotional, because all these things happen when you're pregnant, how you gonna cover that? You're not gonna be able to cover that. And any, anyhow, anyhow, if you start a lie, you have to maintain a lie. And somewhere along the lines, you're gonna get tripped up. Honey, you need to go ahead, bite the bullet, and you might lose your husband. You just might, but those were decisions and choices that you made when you were doing what you were doing. But you need to go ahead, bite the bullet. You better pray. Pray that he has forgiveness, um, you know, forgiveness for you, and that he graces you because God could work in him that he does forgive you, and you know, and that y'all make it through this storm. Because let's be real, marriages go through storms, and you're not the first person or the only person that has ever um been unfaithful in a marriage. Yeah. So, but the thing is now you have to deal with it. Anonymous, I'm gonna call you A. Hey A girl. Um, there is this show that I enjoy watching called Paternity Court. Oh, yeah. And those people be so told up, OJ. Call Paternity Court, and A, I don't want to see you on Paternity Court. No, I do not, because at the end of the day, at this point, it ain't even about you, and it ain't even about who you've been sleeping with, it's about this child. You cannot not say anything and allow your husband to potentially raise a child that's not his. Right. You cannot not say anything, and um you don't know who who the daddy is at all. Right. So, like Tina said, you're going to have to say something. And if I were you, I would say something to my husband first. Absolutely. I would say, and it's it's gonna sound because I I can understand where you might be, because you're scared. And I don't know if he was just being, you know, um sarcastic with the fact that he would kill both of y'all. He might, but he might. He might. He might be so angry and so hurt, you know, only you know your husband. You know your husband better than we do. Right. So I would play it like this Lord Jesus help me. But I'm just telling you what Jay would do. I would tell my husband that I'm pregnant, I would tell my husband that um we need to go to the doctor. I would talk to my doctor and tell my doctor I need to get a paternity test because it's confidential. Your doctor cannot say anything to your husband if you tell your doctor not to. That's right. So I would say I I need to get a paternity test and I need to get his DNA or whatever the case is. Oh, so sneaky. I ain't done. I I need to I need to figure out this situation. I'm telling you what I would do. No, give it to us, girl. So I mean, you probably get ready to help old girl. So I if the doctor is able to complete the mission, to complete the mission, and you find out, I don't know, girl. Maybe I don't know. They're gonna have to figure it out. Maybe he needs to be tested for I don't know. We just need to figure it out. But I would say, I would say, okay, um, if if you if you can figure it out, because if you can't, then you're just gonna have to come and just tell them straight out. But if you can figure it out with the doctor, then and that child ain't his, you need to set your husband down and say, look, I was I love you. I don't I was very ignorant. I gave into temptation. We talked about this last week. I gave into temptation, and this is where it is. I know that I may lose you, but this is where it is. Okay, now if it is his child, you wouldn't say anything? I would call that side and tell that side, this is it. We are done. Of course it was. I ain't gonna see you no more ever in life. And that's and it's a wrap, and I would say, God, please chill and protect me through this. And it was a bad lesson for me, but God, I pray that you spare me, and and you can only wait and see how things happen, because that sign might show up at your house. What's done in the dark always comes to it? It's always it always comes to the light. But I'm telling you what I would do, I get it. And that would be my mindset, and that's what I would be saying. But you know, anybody that knows me know this can never be me. Cause as soon as it happened, I'll come in the house and tell mine. Yeah, like that's me. But anyway, I'm just saying that's how I would play it. But the whole truth, and to be honest about things, is that you just really need to be honest with both of them. Right, absolutely. That's the truth, absolutely, and I would start with my husband. Absolutely. Because like listening to both sides, like I like Jay gave you a way of a way of escape. But understand though, but understand. You might not escape all the way out. You you may not, you may not fully escape and understand that the reperc repercussions of what you have done is going to follow you until it comes out. Because, you know, some people they do little things spitefully, especially that side. Because if it turned out, if it turned out that, you know, oh my God. Hopefully, he ain't in love with you. Oh, God, that's the thing. That's the issue. That's the thing. Because I don't know how long y'all been missing.

unknown 19:42

Oh, Lord.

SPEAKER_00 19:43

But what I I what I I want to understand is what was it? Like, it seemed like you and your husband need to have a conversation anyway, because there's something that is not right between you and your husband in your covenant. And and I do say in your covenant, because when you married him, you made a covenant. It wasn't just, oh, I want to be with you during this particular time or while it's good. You made a covenant with this man. So you need to go back to that man, your man, your husband, and have a conversation because there's something that is not right that in your mind or in your heart and your feelings that made you go outside of your covenant. Tina A said she was just having fun. You should have had fun with your husband. I have plenty of fun with my husband. You can't all of it. You could, you could have, you could roleplay, you could have made him be somebody else. Okay. They got toys, they got all kinds of things that's just to spice things up. Yeah, like you gotta do. I hope your marriage can be safe. I do, I do. I hope your marriage can be safe. Because if this side was a candidate or a contender, you would have put this whole little story a little differently. But you said that if I tell the guy that you've been cheating that you've been cheating with, he will expect me to leave my husband. Yeah, that means it's I don't want to do that. Yeah. And she said, I'm not ready to do that. But you was ready. Yeah. You was ready. I want to see R. Kelly so bad. Sanger, girl. Uh-uh. I feel like you were ready. There it is. There it is. Could have swung you were ready. There it is. Girl, please don't be ready. Don't be ready no more. When the phone, look, you need to block this. Oh my God. I don't know what T D. I don't know. You can J over here shuffling papers. I just don't know what to do. I don't know what to do because you can't block him. That's gonna make him mad. Yeah. Oh, he definitely gonna show up. Yeah, you can't block him. And I pray that he don't know. He know. I was gonna say I was gonna say, if you've been messing with him and if it's an attachment like that, he knows where you live. He knows you work. He knows who your husband is. He knows where he lives. You remember, you remember on Ghost where um Whoopi Goldberg came to what's name? And I think her name was Sally. And she said, Sally, you in trouble. You in danger, girl. I'm sick of you. Yeah. Okay, we're gonna pretend like your name is Sally. Sally, you in danger, girl. I'm sick. It might come from both sides. They might both come hunting you down. Girl, you in danger. Oh my God. You might want to implement implement a little truth and a whole lot of prayer. Now listen, all jokes aside and all this stuff, God has enough grace for all of us. He does. And I'm not, you know, I'm not judging you based off of um this people or whatever. Because we're not judging you at all. Like I said, you are not the first person that has been um unfaithful in a marriage, you know, across this entire world. Okay, here. This stuff happens all the time. It happened today. Right. Because I mean, you said it. It happened yesterday. Right. And it's gonna happen tomorrow. Like exactly. I mean, but the but the fact of the matter is, and the most important part is that you handle the situation appropriately and with care, and that you don't make the same mistakes again. What you can't do is keep yourself in a place where you're doing the same things over and over and over again. If God grace you the first time, you might want to lean on that and appreciate that. Wow. Tina, that take us to our main. I ain't got nothing else to say. Let me tell you something. A look, baby, your focus and your main focus right now is your child. And your child needs to know who her father is, he, he or she, who their father is, and you need to settle your spirit. So you need to talk to your husband because that's the person that you have vowed to. You need to talk to your husband, you need to figure it out with your husband. Even if you tell your husband and it turns out that it is your husband's child, that's fine. Right. But you need to free yourself. Yes. Because either he's gonna say, okay, babe, like, let's figure out why. Right. Or if she has done something in the past. Yeah, we don't know. And she's holding this, and and and this is her get back. Like, we don't even know. It could be a get back. We don't have all the details. We know only you do. Right. But our our prayer is, because we don't want nobody's lives to be lost. Right, absolutely. So our prayer is that God covers and protects this situation, yes, and and helps and leads and guides you to do the right thing. And amen to that. Amen. All right, y'all. So look, we're about to go into this main topic, baby. And you know this WWYD and always correlate in some type of way. And I promise you, we don't plan it, but it just happened out this way. So here we go. Ready, Tina? I'm ready if you are. Help me overcome my struggle. Oh, wow. We're talking about struggles and overcoming. Yes. Help me overcome my struggle. Because the struggle be real. Go ahead and take it, girl. Take it, girl. Okay, y'all. Help me overcome. Let me tell you something. I know what it means to struggle with many things. And it is not a day-to-day something. It is a second-by-second something. And it is constant. Say that. It is constant to resist. It is constant to say, like, let me make the decision to overcome this. Because a lot of times a struggle means that it's something you shouldn't do or something that shouldn't be a part of you, but you want it to be. That's the way I look at struggle. It's like, if I'm struggling with something, I really want it. I really want it. I got a desire for it. I need it. I want it. It's a part of me. It's been there for a while, or whatever, but I understand or I have come to the realization now that I don't need it. And it shouldn't be there. And so, and so it's it's something that is hard for me. So that's how I think about struggle. So I, you know, I know that it's hard. I know that it's difficult. Um, I know that it's a it's a chore. It's something that you that you are very conscientious of every day.

SPEAKER_01 26:54

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 26:55

Absolutely. So when I think about um struggle, so we use the term the struggle is real. And most of the time when we're using that term the struggle is real, it's because we have a lot of things that are going on in our lives. You know, like we have a lot of things that are coming up against us at one time. Kind of some of us have job experiences. Some folks don't know nothing about that, but some of us actually have Job experiences. But um, but not even to go that deep or you know, that far of depth when it comes to it. To struggle is the struggle, like your day-to-day. Some people struggle with just getting up and being motivated in the morning, some people struggle to keep a job, some people struggle um to be a good person and to keep their mouths from saying and speaking bad things. Yes, that's me. Girl, bye. When people struggle, people struggle over um, you know, over many things. And I think the biggest part of that, um, and while we say it is what it is, it's just like what you said, Jay, is because it's because um, like on the end of the temptation, where it's like I'm struggling not to say it, uh, you or I start to say it and I have to stop, and I'm struggling to do good or to be good, you know. But then there's um, but see, there's a difference though. Some of the struggle like that we deal, the struggles we deal with and we go through aren't because we it like they're not from something intentional, it's from things that we don't control. And so all it does is it leaves us with have trying to figure out how to maintain when it comes to that particular situation. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does. I mean, and like because some granted, some things like you said, that we may struggle to do are necessities, but like our flesh just don't want to do it. Right. Or like um our character or our character flaws that we have just don't want to like conform to it or to carry it out. And so that's a battle. And then um some of us struggle with sinning. That's right. Okay, that's right, going again to it. And it's and the thing about it is you know that you don't want to do it or that it's something you shouldn't do because we get convicted, we have a conscience or whatever, and we're like, no, oh my god, I've done it again. Oh God, like I done gave into temptation again, I didn't done this, I didn't done that. And so um that's when it starts to become into um the intent of a thing and the will the willfulness of a thing. Absolutely. And we don't want to be in that gray area where we continue to intentionally do something, and then we ask for forgiveness, intentionally do something, same thing, ask for forgiveness. You're doing the same thing over and over again, you're asking for forgiveness on the same thing because you keep feeling you're asking for forgiveness because you keep feeling convicted about it. Right. And and you wouldn't feel as though it was anything that was wrong if it wasn't wrong to you, if you didn't know that it was wrong. That's right. But what happens though when you continue to do it over and over and you continue to get um convicted about it, but then there comes a point because you do it over and over and you just think that asking for that forgiveness is enough and that you can continue to keep the same pattern, it doesn't work. That's that's tricky. That's true, like that. That's not how that for one thing, if we're looking at it from a biblical perspective, because you know I'm gonna look at it like that. For one thing, grace that the grace that God gives us is not to be taken for granted. Because at any point in time, the Lord can take that grace from you. And usually you start seeing when the grace is starting to dwindle, when the conviction starts to go away. If you keep doing the same things that you know that are wrong over and over and over, eventually the conviction is gonna leave. Because while you are pushing the Holy Spirit out of that placement to where they can actually come to you and talk to you and say and give the correction, you are telling the Holy Spirit, I don't want that, I'm not gonna receive that. And so now, since you're not you don't want that, you're not gonna receive that. Well, what would make you think that the Holy Spirit is gonna continue to show up to speak on that? That's just like like that's just like um, let me see. For instance, um you go, you go to a place, right? Mm-hmm. You go to a place, and or you go with friends to a place. I hope I can put this together right. Put it together, work it out. You go with friends to a place, right? And these are supposed to be your friends, but then you realize that what's going on, but you know, with you and the friends, like it's something that you don't necessarily agree with, right? You don't agree with what it is that the friends are doing, but you keep going. And the Holy Spirit then told you, don't go. I don't go because you know what they're gonna do, don't go. You know what they're gonna do, don't go. And you keep going over and over. And then when it messed around, it happens. That trouble mess around and breaks out because you already knew that the friend was no good, and the Holy Spirit tried to tell you, but that last time the Holy Spirit didn't come to you and tell you, don't go, because you you wanted to do what you wanted to do. There was no longer a struggle. No, there was no longer a struggle, and since there was no longer a struggle, there was no longer consequences, and when there was no longer conviction, then comes the consequences. Simple as that. Honey, the grace and the mercy has an aspiration. Come on, say that, girl. And that's what we have to understand, and that's what we have to be um conscious of, is that yes, God is a loving God, God is a forgiving God, but just as though our patience run thin, God's patience with us runs thin. Because if he has been trying and trying and trying to um deliver you from something, and he has been trying because you have cried out to him and you've been asking and asking and asking and asking and asking and begging and begging, and he's made those provisions for you to be delivered. He even takes you as far as taking you to the point of deliverance, and then you fall back into that, or you pull back or you go back because you miss the taste of it, right? You miss the smell, you miss like what whatever that feeling was. And we have to understand that God is greater than a feeling. Come on, God is greater than an idea of something, or um, or you know, a false perception of something. That's how we make um allow ourselves to go into a reprobate mind. And those are things that we don't want to do. And here's the thing a lot of us have heard the word for years and years and years, and hear the Bible taught for years and years and years, and we never had a full understanding of what different things mean or different um um different, I guess, connotations. We we don't understand what they mean, we just know that we've heard them. Right. We know that we've heard these phrases before. We know that, you know, um we've sat in Bible study, Sunday school preaching or whatever, and heard all these things, but we never really knew how to apply. And so we have to talk about the application of a thing. Come on, come on. And so if we're talking about the application of a thing, then we have to apply this to our lives so that we can live in a life, uh, live a life that is free, that is free, that is um, that is fulfilling, that is whole. I don't know about you, but I don't want to live a life where I'm paranoid. I don't want to live a life where I'm thinking like, oh my God, if you come today, I ain't gonna make it. Like, I don't want to, I don't want to live a life of bondage. And so you pray and you ask God and you and you live and move towards freedom and towards wholeness. That's awesome. That's awesome, Jay. Um, we definitely are riding down the same street because the very next thing that I was gonna say is we struggle with things, but how do we how do we get beyond it? Yeah. How do we get beyond the struggle? The fact of the matter is you cannot get beyond the struggle unless number one, you identify it and you um and you uh what's what's the word? Um admit. You admit to what the issue is. And the second point, which is the most important point, is that you have got to change the behavior. Even though you're not pleasing your flesh, doing whatever it is that you want to do, what you have to change the behavior into what you must do. And so when you start aligning your behavior and your your behavior and actions with what's right, yeah, that creates the change. It's just like um, it's just like saying, when you go to um, okay, like if you go to work out, you gotta work out day after day after day after day. And once you start working out and it becomes a habit, you're creating a good habit. And your body starts to adjust to what is good. It adjusts to the good habit. Yeah and you start to see the results. But if we don't create a good habit, then all we're doing is leaving things in that same space where the struggle will always remain. And it makes it real that the struggle is real and it always stays there. So we have to practice and create good habits. Now, how do we do that? How do we practice and and create good habits? Number one, if you pray, you have already admitted to or owned up to the conviction, right? So now you've owned up to the conviction and now you start to pray about it. But this is the thing God says that we cannot do anything on our own. We can't do anything apart from him, right? So we can't do anything apart from him. So if we make him first, then that means that he gives us the power that we can overcome whatever it is that we struggle with. But the only way that we can do that is if we stay connected with him. So that means staying in prayer, reading your Bible, constantly talking to the Lord, surrounding yourself in areas that are good, changing like that goes back to changing the behaviors. Sometimes changing the behaviors is the people that you're around or the placements that you're in. You have to begin to implement all these different things. But when you start implementing all these different things, and now your your mind and your spirit is more open to receiving the conviction and the correction. So now you're receiving the conviction. You're receiving the correction. Now what do we do? Because a lot of times the things that we go through, it's it's we want to call it, we want to call it a habit, but sometimes they're curses and sometimes they're um they're spirits that we're actually fighting up against. And the word talks about whenever there's something that is unclean in us, when there's an unclean spirit that's in us that lives in us, because we allow it residence. So now it's grown and it's become adapted to it's it's become adapted to how we live in our nature. But the thing is, when you begin to do this new behavior, this good behavior, where you're saying, no, I'm not gonna do that. No, you start to push those spirits and you start to push those curses out of the way. But when you begin to push those spirits and those curses out of the way, those bad habits out of the way, now you got to replace that with what is good. That's why it's not okay that you just, it's not okay that you just um pray every now and again or that you talk to God every now and again. You have to keep it consistent. You got to keep that space filled with good because if you don't keep that space filled with good, you will easily and quickly revert back to what was bad, which created the trouble. So, Tina, I echo everything that you have said because sometimes I feel like, and I have heard this, you know, my heart is for the youth. So, like, I've always like um I guess participated in some form of outreach with youth ministry, something. And so the biggest thing that you hear is like, I want to do right, I want to live for God, I want to, even even if they don't know that it's like I want to live for God or I want to do good, I just want to be good, right? So I I equate that to not just young people, I equate that to adults too, because if you're an adult and you never you didn't grow up in church, right? Or you didn't grow up in uh any particular religion or anything like that. You just know that like your desire is to be a good person, right? Your desire is to be right, is to be good, right? So then okay, like let's unpack that and let's look at that. So if you are a person and because I I want to be cognitive of the people that may be listening to us that have not been to church or been introduced to Jesus or anything like that, right? Right? So if you say, look, I just want to be good, I want to do right, I want, I want to be the best person that I can be with the time that I have here on earth. Right. Okay. So nothing changes with anything that we've already said. It's exactly the same because you have intuition, you have a conscience. As a person, you have your own set of morals. Things that you will do, things that you won't do, right? Things that you see that they are wrong or you feel that they are right. I like when you're going. Some things that you feel that they that you know that they are right because you just know within yourself that this is right and this is wrong. That's right. Okay. It's not always a church thing. I like where you're going. So then on the other part of it is culturally. So there are things we understand what culture is. Culture are things that have been taught to you, traditions, right. Things that you have that you have um adopted or adapted to your life because of the group of people that you grew up with, right? Or the or the household that you were in, or what you were around, or what you were familiar with, right? So this is what I challenge you to do as this person that is like, look, like, I mean, I know right from wrong, but I also have these things that I struggle with that are wrong, but you know, I want to be right. So I just say for for you, just start talking. Just start talking. I saw and I got to remember who said this to me. I think it was Sean. It was this little boy talking about how he talks to himself in the mirror. Oh, wow. And when he talks to himself in the mirror, to him, when he's looking in the mirror, it's multiple um dimensions. Oh, yeah, yeah. Is the way that he sees it. Yeah. So he is speaking to himself in multiple dimensions. Oh, that's good. Okay. I'm gonna send it to you. Yeah. Um, and so he's speaking to himself in multiple dimensions, and he said, but he can't say it out loud. He said he has to say it quietly. Right. Because, and I can't remember how he broke it down. This is a child, y'all. And the Bible says, I'm an Albert. Come on. But this is a child. He was like, I have to say it quietly. He was like, because um, you know, you don't want, you don't want it to get outside of the dimensions of you speaking to yourself, so to speak. And the enemy of trying to get up. And what I'm gonna do, y'all, I'm gonna put, I'm going to put it on social media, like on our on our um page, and I'm gonna post it. Because I believe we get credit where credit is due. And this is a child that said this. But what it meant, what it broke down to me is that you have to speak to yourself. So when you start speaking to yourself, if you don't own, if you don't um consider. Consider yourself being with any religion, having any type of belief or whatever, you know you. That's right. So you start talking to yourself, and the spirit that lives in you is going to start to minister to you and it's going to start to reveal to you who that spirit really is. Oh, wee, that's deep, girl. Okay. That's deep. That's deep. And so it's about you, yourself, and in your case, I, right? And you have that conversation and you unpack within yourself what it is that you see for your life and for your purpose. I promise you, your spirit is going to start to reveal some things to you. Okay. Your spirit is going to start revealing things to you, and it's going to be very clear, very clear what your direction is and what your purpose is. And do not be surprised what ends up happening and what ends up being revealed to you. And don't be surprised who starts to come to you and share and pour into you. Come on, she's not going to be able to do that. Because you too, because you took the time to say, look, I'm getting ready to get behind my flesh, and I want to tap into my spirit to figure out who I really am. Because all I know right now is surface. And for me, flesh is surface. Say that. Flesh is surface. It's what people see, it's what people judge you by. It's what people, it's what they can see with their eyes. It's not the unseen. Your spirit is the unseen. That's right. So when it's the world. Yeah. So when your spirit, when you start when you start to activate your spirit, man, things become more clear and things become revealed to you. And I promise you that you're going to be reminded of the time to where you came in in some type of encounter with your creator. That's deep. That's that's deep. That's good. That's good stuff. You know, when people talk about folks dropping nuggets and things like that, Lord, have mercy. That right there was good. That right there is good instruction, good advice. That's that's knowledge, that's wisdom that she just poured out. That right there just came from the Holy Spirit. That right there is telling you how to connect with him and trying and how to figure out who you are. Yeah, because God is not wrapped up in religion. I'm sorry. He's not, he's not wrapped up in religion. He's everywhere. He is everywhere, he is through all dispensations of time. He is everywhere through everything. Yes, it is. And it's man-made. That's it. That's it. It's man-made. So if you can get beyond your flesh and beyond man and tap into your spirit, then you'll get the realness of who you really are. That's good. We are not separated from our father. That's right. That's good. That's good. Girl, that's good. That's good. Listen, and for those of you that are struggling, like we like I mentioned briefly earlier, but and I want to go back to it because it's important. Sometimes the struggle is not um is not to do with um sin or temptation or anything like that. Sometimes it's just a daily struggle just to get up in the morning and just to keep going on and just to keep moving. So for those of you that struggle with that, still the principles in which what Jay and myself gave you, they still can be applied.

SPEAKER_01 47:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:41

Still find and talk to your inner self that in the in the dimensions of which you are, still change the habits and the ways and the thinking. Start in your mind. It has to start somewhere. Start in your mind. And when you change the habits and the way that you think in your mind, start implementing new things to create change to get you away from what it is that you currently see that you feel like it's creating your struggle. Life is hard. It is life is hard, and we all have to deal with the cards that were dealt. And some of us have a heavier hand than others. And we we're gonna be real about this because usually it is. Some people are going through things that other that some of us could never imagine, and we would never make it through. We wouldn't make it through. We don't give people enough credit, but instead we look at folks and we judge them by what we see. You don't know how that person got to the place in which they are currently in. You don't know what happened, what manifested in their life, and the very thing that happened to them or that manifested in their life, if you've never experienced it, is for a reason. God didn't let God didn't allow it to happen to you because you couldn't strong enough. You weren't strong enough. You would have perished in that season. Yeah, you were not strong enough. You would have perished. If you think about the most horrific thing that you can think about for someone to grow up in a situation or whatever, is it happened today? That's what you need to know. Right. The most horrific thing that you can think about that anybody could endure or go through, it happened just a second ago. And when you get that in your head and you understand that we are not in control, right?

SPEAKER_02 49:31

Right.

SPEAKER_00 49:32

And because we're not in control, because we're not all knowing, because we're not all seeing, because we're not in all these many different places as our father is, tell it, Jay. Then we cannot place judgment or we cannot look at somebody's circumstance or their life or what have you tell it and tell them you should be able to overcome that struggle. What's wrong with you? Like you can't do that. No spirits in it, ain't never been through it, ain't never watched your parent go through it, and then now that's familiar to you, or you end up tasting and going through. Right. You hadn't seen it. You hadn't seen it, and you looking from the outside. The outside looking in. You know what? What's crazy is, and I'm gonna change this thing around, is you can be standing on the outside, and it's sunny, but it could be raining on the inside. That's it. On the inside of that glass that you're looking through into somebody else's house, it could be raining, flooding, and you standing on the outside in the sun, talking about it. Talking about, oh, that's so beautiful. Like, why it or or better yet, looking at it, talking up, looking at them talking about, oh, they ought to be able to overcome that. They are like that. Ain't that ain't nothing. You don't know. You don't know because you're not in the situation and you do not know all the details. Thank God that he does not reveal everything to everybody. Thank you. And thank God that he is in the details. Come on. Because when God is in the details, nothing is left undone. Nothing. Not any piece, not any fragment is left undone. He don't give you fragments, come on. He doesn't give you run-on sentences. He dots every R across the city and gives you the appropriate punctuation for everything. He is in the details of your life story. And you just gotta allow him to continue to be the author and you be the co-author. Come on. Because as the co-author, you are obeying and following what the author then said. Period. Girl, everything that Jay just said so deep. Like you just dropping gym after gym after gym. All I'm gonna say is this for those of you that are struggling, period, whether it's in life, whether it's to do what's right, uh, whatever it is, those of you that are struggling, period. I just, I just pray for you. Um, I'm gonna put it, how about this? I'm I'm gonna pray for you. I'm gonna pray for you. Father, in the name of Jesus, for all of those that are listening and that are going through right now. I know that there are some people that are on the spectrum of some people that are on, actually, people are on different spectrums. You got some that are on the spectrum that's of the world, you got some that are on the spectrum that are spiritual. God, I want you to reach and touch every single individual. Find them exactly where they are. Whatever it is that they are going through, that they are having a hard time with that is that is stopping them from moving forward in the goodness and the blessing and which you have for them, God, I pray that you speak to them now. I pray that they receive your Holy Spirit, God. I pray that they receive your conviction that you send to them to make them change and to do right, that they receive you as you come to them, Father God. And that when they receive you, that you bless them and that you bless not only that you bless them, but you do it quickly, God. Do it in an expedited way. Lord, if they turn to you and they be reminded that they belong to you, God, accept them back, reconcile them unto you, and present them back unto this world as a mouthpiece for you, Father God. God, I pray, Lord, that you bless them, that you keep them encouraged in a way in which it can be not touchable, that the words of man cannot come up against them, that the thoughts of people cannot come up against them, not even the thoughts in their own minds. Lord, change the mindsets of your people, God, that they might be delivered, that they might receive, that they might receive your goodness in its fullness, God. Father God, I just thank you today for every single person under the sound of my voice that hears this prayer that was in need, that reached out to you. God, bless them in a special and mighty way. And Lord, there's none of us that are perfect, God. So everything that's in us that's not like you, I pray and ask that you forgive us of all those things. And just like your word says, where you forgive and you clean that out, Lord, pour your goodness back into them. And let that goodness be the good yeast that takes over and that it runs out everything that's bad. God, we give you glory, we give you honor and praise for everything that you've done, all that you are about to do. In Jesus' name, amen. Amen. We got something different today, y'all. We're gonna do something different. We're gonna do something a little different because we love back in the day, because back in the day be giving us our whole life. It does. But um I got a question for you. Uh-oh. Go ahead. I got a question for you. Since we're gonna do something a little bit different. Tell me something that is one of your OCD problems. When people go in the refrigerator without washing their hands. Absolutely. That should be everybody's OCD problem. I got more. Girl, give me more. When people don't cover their mouth when they cough and when they're so nasty. And then they don't want to wash their hands and get some hand sanitizer afterwards. That. Oh my god, I got so many. This is so bad, y'all. I I hate that I got so many. But I got so many. I I don't like when my food touches. You don't like when your food touch? No. Oh, you're one of those. Okay. I don't like when people use their same food plate for their dessert plate. Really? You're gonna put your dessert on top of you're gonna put judges on top of your food that you just put in a way. I mean, but in church, you don't put it on the case. I don't get not either. Whatever. You know, an event or whatever. I don't care. Ew, no. We're not even the beans that run, you know, the juices from the beans and the collets and I'm gonna be able to do it. Let me tell you something. Separate bows. I'm not eating that like that. I and then the people that use the same fork and oh my god. Oh, you a straight up um cracker barrel uh type girl. Like everything gotta be in its own separate dish. You better say that. That's why we go there a lot. Don't tell me. We do, we do, we do. My OCD that I realized the other day is when I go to a restroom, and if it is a public restroom, because I do not like to use the public restroom. Me either. I hate it. And I see people going in and out of the restroom, and and then they go to the restroom and they don't watch anything. Well, that's another pet peeve. That's nasty, that's nasty. But when I go into a um public restroom, one thing I notice that I always do is that I will not use the tissue that's hanging. I have got to scare that mess off. I can't like I cannot use the tissue that's hanging. I can't trust it. I don't know what was on it. I I don't know if the last person, when they were grabbing tissue that they had their hands on my piece of tissue, like my mind really thinks about all of this stuff. My mind, it like it all it registers all this stuff. And so I can't do that. Like I cannot, I I as soon as I go in, I gotta tear that off. I gotta tear that off. I can't use that. Yeah, you don't use that. That's nasty. And the other thing, too, is you see since you said restaurants, baby, I don't even know where that is below a 97.5, which is a radio station. And she ain't playing. I do not do it. She ain't playing. I ain't doing it. She ain't playing. She will look you up to see what your score is before she goes there to eat. Because I remember one day I was like, yo, Jay, you want me to bring you something? Blah, blah, blah, we would get ready to meet. And I told her where I was going, and she was like, which one? Soon as she said it, I was like, Oh no gosh, what is it? No. She is not playing. So for those of you in the restaurant um um chains and and in, you know, business, period. Y'all better get it right because y'all losing people for real. Yeah, I don't, I don't do it. I have walked, I have walked in and walked out of many restaurants. Sometimes I walked in and asked them why. I know that's right. And but there's this wonderful thing called Yelp. And if you go on Yelp and you type in that restaurant with the location of where it is, it will tell you when their last inspection, and it will give you what their grade was and the date that they received the grade and why they got the marks off. Yelp, y'all better use it. Y'all better use it. I use it faithfully. And don't let me buy the town. Because, baby, we can ready to go to Atlanta. I'm gonna be all on Yelp. Tina, we're eating now. She ain't playing. She is not playing. I'm gonna say, we are not eating now. This girl is for real. She is for real. So if you want to see a Jay, you better get it right. You better get it right. Now, my other thing I'll say is that I am OCD about putting things back the way that I found it. Oh, period. Oh, God, it drives me crazy. And this right here, I'm gonna talk about, I'm gonna talk about my sons um real quick. Yo, watch him out. Watch him out, Tina. Watch him out. And these her and these nephews of hers, I'm gonna tell like it is because I'm the mama. Whatever, watch him out. This is what these, this is what these dudes do. So I can tell if you be in like in my house, in my room, messing around, messing with something. I can tell. Because I know where everything is, I know the way that it's placed. And it's and it's I got it placed like that. It's for a reason. So I want it there, and I want it in that place. Let me go and walk into the house, and especially if you come into my room. I know when you come into my room. But they got this thing though. Like I can tell, I can walk through the house and tell exactly where they've been. I told them, I was like, y'all better not never get in trouble. Uh-uh. You better never get in trouble because somebody will be able to track you just based off of everywhere you went, based off of everything that you touched. It drives me easy. You're gonna be able to track them and know. I will, I sure will. So they wouldn't, they would never be able to lie to me. They might be able to lie to somebody else, but they wouldn't lie. They would never be able to lie to me. I'd be like, no, I sit, no, I know you was right here. Let me tell you how I know. My son, Trey, thought that he was gonna try to play me. And I asked him, I was like, you know, well, Trey, um, I can't, I can't remember the full um the full situation, but it was something along the lines of Trey, um, have you seen? I know what it was. He ate my stuff. That's what it was. He ate my stuff. And I was like, um, you listen, I'm listening for me. I'm living for me. But he ate my stuff. He ate my stuff. And I asked him, oh, I was like, Trey, you eat my stuff? He was like, nah. I was like, Trey, you eat my stuff. He was like, nah. I was like, Trey, I know that you ate my stuff. And he was like, What you nah? I didn't mind. I was like, I had you go down the whole, the whole like list of why I knew that he ate my stuff. And then he was like, he just gonna laugh. He just gonna break the laugh and like, no, uh-uh. First of all, you should idiot, you should have led with, you should have led with I know you ate it. Girl, they not kids no more, they grown. So you should have led with I know you ate my stuff. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. I like honestly, I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt. But this joker is gonna try to say no until I run down the line of things that showed me the evidence that he ate it. And then he's gonna bust out laughing. I said, I said I told you. I would have too. I told you. I would have I would have held on to that lie too. I would have been like, uh-uh, you ate it, girl. Oh my gosh. Girl. You just forgot. I just can't, I just can't deal with you with these nephews. No, I just can't deal with you with these nephews. Um let me tell you something. I'm always gonna have that back, but I'm also gonna always correct them. Well, you need to correct him on eating my stuff. Because I'm not sick of that, like for real. If he was hungry, if there was nothing else in there for him to get and your stuff was it, then that much hunger. You need to go get your you need to go get some more. Girl, bye. Oh gosh, that was awesome though. Yeah, girl. I tell you, my like my pet peeves just got I got a list of pet peeves. So I'm gonna say something next time because I I got a list of OCD things that just irritate me to no end. It really do. Y'all are going to be. And I'm working on it. And I'm working on it. I'm really working on it. Because I try to let things go for a little bit a little bit longer for my spouse to realize that we've talked about it several times and did that again. This again. So you did it. Just gonna leave this here, and hopefully you will remember. And yeah, you're thinking about us. They are not thinking about us. It never happens, and I come back mad and sick to that's why that's why a lot of times I I end up just going on and doing whatever it is that I feel like needs to be done. I'm gonna do it. I don't even want to look because at the end of the day, you learn you learn your person. You learn who you with. You do. And you know the spirits and you know the weaknesses, and we make up for each other's story. It is what it is. Oh my god. Well, we thank y'all for hanging out with us yet another episode, baby. And this is episode 25. 20 rows, two, two, two, two, two, two, two, zero. That's the soul. And we always do this. Oh my god, we're watching a little bit. I like it.